Bizzaro21 Posted February 18, 2015 Share Posted February 18, 2015 (edited) So I got bored today at school, decided to make time worth it.. WARNING: Heavy TL;DR ahead Here is what I wrote, please consider that this is the first poetic thing I ever wrote in my life.. Oh, dear mark * I just received a stalker mark Thanks to stalker`s dearest cousin * guess who is it I think you know it Lech kril will loudly bark * as the stalker f***s me at the park He will spam his dispel troll * then he will introduce you to the wall He feels like taking souls * but he hates them vauban balls they don`t stop to shock * and stalker hates to get stunlock So he invented the dispel swag * this power forced him to spam so he had to put natural talent * his build is so stuffed that he says "goddammit" He once tried thunderbolt mod * but all he got was a face full of bolts he said this mod is weak & a DUD * so he complained to a fellow DE bud He neither obeyed nor even gave a %&^# * stalker shot him so hard that till today he is stuck the stalker went to the dock * to meet up with his doc. Doctor said dispel will hurt the user * the stalker says "he is such a loser" The diagnosis revealed * the stalker`s braton got him pealed Stalker had to admit * he got mugged because of it "that thing is so weak" * "I stayed in bed for a week" "When I came back to work" * "I decided to try a pitch-fork" "Try it" people said * "It`ll be fun" they said "I was so helpless back there" * " I got so frustrated that I dropped despair" "People took it litteral" * "They put a waypoint on my shuriken poster" "They used a lot of morphics" * "They made it real but it needed a little fix" "Why is that?" the doctor asked * Stalker`s answer was that the projectiles would spin back The doctor started to laugh * Stalker wished he had a staff Stalker looks tough * he needs a hell of a buff The doctor gave him an idea for stalker 2.0 * he said it`ll make him a hero He gave him some adorable weapons * a chewy toy and some toy hammers Stalker then started to mock his doctor * he said his idea was lackluster He wanted something more bloodthirsty * something that has 5000 DPS at lvl 30 So the doctor shook his head * then he came up with "the dread" The stalker did like the name * but the stats of it were so lame When Stalker saw the base damage he was like "wut?" * " I deserve a better plot" "You should enhance your bot" the doctor said then * "I want a pistol with magazine size of ten" "That`s weird, it had the exact some number" the doctor said * Stalker asked: "what did? "the thing you dropped" * "Does it? HOLLY @#%$ !!" "Go get`em tiger" doctor said * Stalker said indeed he will So he thought for a moment * rather longer than a moment The entire morning in fact * then an idea had an impact he decided to take it back * but the question was how? He tried the easy way, he dressed in pink and tried to discuss * nobody even said "hey", they kicked him out and he felt disgust Distrust took its place * in hate he rushed with a great pace he hid in the dark * waiting for someone to take a deathmark Rather shortly afterwards * he saw the tenno running in hoards there was an infestation outbreak * he thought it is loyalty but the reward was 2 alad v coordinates he took the chance as it was a Phorid * he gave them all marks even though he hates Phorid But alas, his luck was horrid * he choked to death by a Nova`s Torid After the tenno left, he started gathering his stuff to go * then he found something that gave him some releif "This is just what I need!" * "It should help me a lot, I believe" Of course it is the hate he found * he never knew he had it, but with it stalker would want to be found so he can get his good old weapon back * but the tenno still beat him due to his biggest lack He needed a gun * it wasn`t so fun For him at least * Tenno are beasts They don`t know pain yet * oh but they will soon enough if you wait his bow was being built * he didn`t want to feel guilt so he didn`t rush its build * the item was defective last time he did ....... The dread is finished * the time has come he checked his E-MAIL for marks he had sent * he found so few that his hope got bent then his cousin called * he said Tenno had made him bald! The stalker said "don`t worry" * "I`ll avenge you little -cuzy-" He sent the squad deathmarks * the next mission they entered he showed up to one of them "the blood of cous- er, Kril is on your hands, did you really think there would be no repercussios? * the Tenno were stressed as they were low ranked, so they took cover But he got one of them, which dropped the despair Blueprint * Stalker wnet to get it when he knew what it meant to be in agony, as he bled out on the ground * his psyche was at risk Blueprint loss was inbound He consulted his nephew, Alad V * Alad said "you should always make a deal" "I get you your shurikens back, and you get me a Nekros warframe for Zanuka, he needs a new scarf" * "Stalker agreed and went on the hunt at Europa`s wharf he found an event running there * "nice they`ll be busy enough for me to set the snares" So he tried that, the event was survival * "even better, a bunch of Nekroses", his breather was handy, though not vital He won`t choke to death * he`ll always have a fancy 5 health he targeted the Nekros and captured him * SIDE NOTE: the Tenno suffocated without him When stalker went back to Alad V, he found that he got shot but still lived * the deal was done even though Zanuka is dead Now that he has a powerful Secondary * He became tough to carry "Now I hunt, diving your numbers. Watching from that dark place, cataloging your sins, I am the ghost of retribution. You may forget, but you`re not innocent" What you think? Any criticism is welcome :) Edited February 18, 2015 by Bizzaro21 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
TheVerdict Posted February 18, 2015 Share Posted February 18, 2015 I have no words. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Bizzaro21 Posted February 18, 2015 Author Share Posted February 18, 2015 Any spots you didn`t like? Rhyme got a little tilted at some point Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Blackout751 Posted February 19, 2015 Share Posted February 19, 2015 I trust no-one asks if you spent your school time well? Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Bizzaro21 Posted February 19, 2015 Author Share Posted February 19, 2015 wut? Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Coverop Posted February 19, 2015 Share Posted February 19, 2015 That was fantastic story. Wish I could see it before. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Bizzaro21 Posted February 19, 2015 Author Share Posted February 19, 2015 Glad you liked it :) Boredom produces interesting stuff apparently xD Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
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