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25 minutes ago, (PS4)Viveeeh said:

I just telling you guys all this because I want you to see hope, and tell you there's no shame in seeking help.

I mean, while it's true that all I had so far in terms of dating are bad experiences, I don't have that much of a problem with it.

 

Like, I'm lazy, never do anything if I don't have any immediate profit from it, never go outside unless it can't be avoided, and I avoid my responsibilites like they're the plague. But I can live with it. When you get rejected 6 times in a row you eventually stop to care.

If I ever happen to run into someone who's interested in me, great, I'll give it a try. If not, fine by me. I'm fully aware that I'm not good with people and I'm okay with it.

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On 2020-06-05 at 11:04 AM, (PS4)Viveeeh said:

@Sziklamester you sounded like having a problem, but if you don't, I'm sorry for misunderstanding the situation. English isn't my native language either 🙂

If you're feeling good, just do what you're doing, the self confidence thing was just a real life example (and also a shot in the dark). But I want to ask, and expect no answer.

Are you sure about being fine?

Ok guys, I'll leave you to it now, being overly pushy really does not help.

I am fine because I partly hate people and hardly tolerate them but on the other hand I do not hate them as much. You are a good soul to try to help but I really no need that much help.

I only need some likemind people to talk about everything interesting subjects. It is fine if not everything has common interest but it is fine. Also your english isn't that bad but mine is sucks because of grammar.

/ps - mobile app autocorrected me so I edited it.

 

Köszönöm, hogy foglalkozol mással 😉

Edited by Sziklamester
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vor 3 Minuten schrieb (PS4)Viveeeh:

and also a shot in the dark

Yeah you shoot inside of me, its ok, others tried that too lol

vor 3 Minuten schrieb Sziklamester:

Hajrá hajrá! csekkolom.

Means?

vor 4 Minuten schrieb (PS4)Viveeeh:

English isn't my native language either

And it is?

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2 minutes ago, o0Despair0o said:

I mean, while it's true that all I had so far in terms of dating are bad experiences, I don't have that much of a problem with it.

 

Like, I'm lazy, never do anything if I don't have any immediate profit from it, never go outside unless it can't be avoided, and I avoid my responsibilites like they're the plague. But I can live with it. When you get rejected 6 times in a row you eventually stop to care.

If I ever happen to run into someone who's interested in me, great, I'll give it a try. If not, fine by me. I'm fully aware that I'm not good with people and I'm okay with it.

I am also a person who likes to stay at home and just rarely go outside. Mostly when need to go work or just going to shop. 

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2 minutes ago, Dark_RRiderr said:

Yeah you shoot inside of me, its ok, others tried that too lol

Means?

And it is?

She is hungarian. 

The hajrá hajrá means - hurry hurry

csekkolom - checking.

/ The fun part what kgabor posted it was posted to me 5 years ago in different form.

Edited by Sziklamester
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1 minute ago, o0Despair0o said:

Like, I'm lazy, never do anything if I don't have any immediate profit from it, never go outside unless it can't be avoided, and I avoid my responsibilites like they're the plague. But I can live with it. When you get rejected 6 times in a row you eventually stop to care.

If I ever happen to run into someone who's interested in me, great, I'll give it a try. If not, fine by me. I'm fully aware that I'm not good with people and I'm okay with it.

That sounds like a solid plan actually, no need to forcefully make things work if they don't come naturally. I feel you by the way, it sounds like we're much alike, I'm just damned lucky to be a woman. Just do me a favour, ok? Next time if you feel a connection, just try - if she doesn't want you, her loss, but if she does, something good can come out of it. 🙂

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1 minute ago, Sziklamester said:

She is hungarian. 

The hajrá hajrá means - hurry hurry

csekkolom - checking.

Yup 🙂

We're like a silent community inside this community, everyone notices everyone eventually, we just rarely mention it explicitly 😄

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Germany here myself.

And i understand that you wanted to be nice and help Viveeeh.

Think if im done with this topic inside, this time its for good maybe, not able to open myself up anymore or connect to a woman in that way anymore in the future.

Wont make me happy, but maybe i at least reach the kind of mood i had for the last decade, neutral and zombie like mood. Never really happy, but also never really fully unhappy as well...

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Just now, (PS4)Viveeeh said:

That sounds like a solid plan actually, no need to forcefully make things work if they don't come naturally. I feel you by the way, it sounds like we're much alike, I'm just damned lucky to be a woman. Just do me a favour, ok? Next time if you feel a connection, just try - if she doesn't want you, her loss, but if she does, something good can come out of it. 🙂

Heh, okay.

I think the problem is that it's pretty obvious that I'm not sure how to proceed in a relationship.

I can become friends with people relatively easily despite being an introvert - as long as they start the conversation with me.

 

I tried several ways of approaching women in this matter. From subtle compliments, simply being myself, writing a letter and hiding it in their bag, to straight up confessing to them.

Didn't work lol. Kinda funny if you think about it. Even the good ol' "be yourself" didn't work.

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1 minute ago, Dark_RRiderr said:

Germany here myself.

And i understand that you wanted to be nice and help Viveeeh.

Think if im done with this topic inside, this time its for good maybe, not able to open myself up anymore or connect to a woman in that way anymore in the future.

Wont make me happy, but maybe i at least reach the kind of mood i had for the last decade, neutral and zombie like mood. Never really happy, but also never really fully unhappy as well...

That state is content. Not beign fully happy but nor unhappy. If you need some idea you can ask us freely. The community is helpful.

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Just now, Dark_RRiderr said:

..... yeah i did that once to someone in my class back then, cant recommend it... is a story behind it

She hit me with the famous "I don't think I want to talk right now", never to be heard from again.

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Just now, Dark_RRiderr said:

..... yeah i did that once to someone in my class back then, cant recommend it... is a story behind it

I did that always in my elementary school and after the secondary school. I just wrote friendly manner letters nothing too deep. Usually that helped me communicate with most of my "nowaday" friends. I am that intovert person who just got negative ratings because not wanted to vocal. When needs to write I am good at that but if I need to speak I am crap but it is fine.

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1 minute ago, o0Despair0o said:

writing a letter and hiding it in their bag

Oh wow, that's such a romantic thing to do!

2 minutes ago, o0Despair0o said:

Kinda funny if you think about it. Even the good ol' "be yourself" didn't work.

Doesn't matter it didn't work yet, it's still a solid way to go. Being yourself isn't a good thing because it will magically give you a girlfriend, no matter what. It's good because if you don't act like a different person as you really are, like-minded people will be able to recognise you're similar, and they may be drawn to you. If you get friends or a girlfriend by pretending, you get yourself into a difficult situation, because you just can't stop if you want to keep them around. Just keep up 🙂

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Just now, (PS4)Viveeeh said:

Oh wow, that's such a romantic thing to do!

Doesn't matter it didn't work yet, it's still a solid way to go. Being yourself isn't a good thing because it will magically give you a girlfriend, no matter what. It's good because if you don't act like a different person as you really are, like-minded people will be able to recognise you're similar, and they may be drawn to you. If you get friends or a girlfriend by pretending, you get yourself into a difficult situation, because you just can't stop if you want to keep them around. Just keep up 🙂

Agreed.

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Imagine you left that class and are not in that school anymore and then one day visit your old class...

... and everyone in the entire school that knows you has a strange smile and laughs behind your back and you dont know why.

And someone approaches you and asks: "Did you write that letter?" and you are dumb enouth admitting that...

Then later you learn from your best friend about what happened...:

That the letter where you were very emotional (/embarrassing) was read out loud in front of everyone by the woman you sent it too...

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1 minute ago, (PS4)Viveeeh said:

Oh wow, that's such a romantic thing to do!

Yeeeeeah... I mean, my handwriting is crap and maaaaaaybe she was actually visiting me and was talking to my mom in the kitchen when I did that...

3 minutes ago, (PS4)Viveeeh said:

Doesn't matter it didn't work yet, it's still a solid way to go. Being yourself isn't a good thing because it will magically give you a girlfriend, no matter what. It's good because if you don't act like a different person as you really are, like-minded people will be able to recognise you're similar, and they may be drawn to you. If you get friends or a girlfriend by pretending, you get yourself into a difficult situation, because you just can't stop if you want to keep them around. Just keep up 🙂

That's the plan. Just keep rolling and see what happens. Worst thing that can happen is that I'll end up a regular in a cheap brothel.

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1 minute ago, Dark_RRiderr said:

Imagine you left that class and are not in that school anymore and then one day visit your old class...

... and everyone in the entire school that knows you has a strange smile and laughs behind your back and you dont know why.

And someone approaches you and asks: "Did you write that letter?" and you are dumb enouth admitting that...

Then later you learn from your best friend about what happened...:

That the letter where you were very emotional (/embarrassing) was read out loud in front of everyone by the woman you sent it too...

Oh that's really bad 😞

I can sympathize. I always was the weird kid at school, especially elementary, I just wasn't so brave as you and didn't communicate my feelings. I had severe social anxiety as a kid, I was at a point where I just couldn't say anything to anyone, I did when I was spoken to, but never on my own. I was made fun of by everyone. It was a dark time.

Still, it's in your past. And what did you do wrong? Nothing, expect trusting the wrong people. And what did they do wrong? Laugh about someone because he was just being sincere. That's way worse. Especially that girl, what she did was terrible, and you should be glad there was nothing between you two!

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vor 1 Minute schrieb (PS4)Viveeeh:

Oh that's really bad 😞

I can sympathize. I always was the weird kid at school, especially elementary, I just wasn't so brave as you and didn't communicate my feelings. I had severe social anxiety as a kid, I was at a point where I just couldn't say anything to anyone, I did when I was spoken to, but never on my own. I was made fun of by everyone. It was a dark time.

Still, it's in your past. And what did you do wrong? Nothing, expect trusting the wrong people. And what did they do wrong? Laugh about someone because he was just being sincere. That's way worse. Especially that girl, what she did was terrible, and you should be glad there was nothing between you two!

Well... i sadly got a magnet to women like that. Just not even in the way they are after me for beeing in a relationship with me, more like just having fun making fun of me behind my back.

And often sadly had crushes on women that are.... crazy, and i dont mean the good crazy.

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1 hour ago, Dark_RRiderr said:

And sadly had crushes on women that are.... crazy, and i dont mean the good crazy.

I know, right?

I can't complain about the number of girls who showed clear interest to me, especially back around the time i was still attending school, ten years ago and before, but one of them who was pretty much the only one i really liked turned out to be someone i later recognised as a narcissist. :/

I don't think she had any malicious intent behind it, but she tried to push me into fights for an ego boost and i'm not the kind of person who would want to put up with that.

It's self-degrading and too risky to have someone like that and i don't consider leaving her a loss for this reason.

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