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I Am The Very Model Of A Modern Grineer-General

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Oh. Why hello there. Didn't see you come in. Welcome. Please, have a seat.


So, A few days ago I posted https://forums.warframe.com/index.php?/topic/129118-i-am-the-very-model-of-a-modern-tenno-general/'>a version of the Modern Major-General song that had been rewritten for Warframe.


Hm? You don't know what the Modern Major-General song is? Oh come on, the Gilbert and Sullivan one! You know, from their comic opera The Pirates of Penzance? Mordin sang it in Mass Effect 2 even!


Okay, okay, twist my arm why don't you. http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Major-General's_Song'>Here's a link to the Wikipedia page.


And http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=wYZM__VdEjk'>here is a link to where you can listen to the original song on Youtube


Well, anyway, the day after I'd posted my version, DE Trevor left a reply that said this:



Hoping for a Modern Grineer General version of this now.


He was perhaps just kidding around.


I don't kid around.


I now humbly present to you:


The Modern Grineer-General Song




A Rousing Song for the Rousing of Grineer


as penned by Grineer poet laureate General Sargas Ruk.



We are the very models of the Modern Grineer General,
With tactics, napalm, steel and augments organo-mechanical
Our war cries put fear in the souls of all our foes galactical
And every single one of us is an adept grammatical;
We've become quite prolific in this black sea cosmonautical
Our ferrite fleet is tough and always fully operational
Every foe will find a squad of Grineer Rollers hounding them,
The terran sector is the prize gem of our solar diadem.


And one day soon we will possess your martial art accoutrements
We will present them to the Sisters as a bloody sacrement;
With tactics, napalm, steel and augments organo-mechanical
We are the very models of the Modern Grineer General.


The first you face is Captain Vor, our Tenno-Grineer aggregate,
And should you happen to defeat him Councilor Hek lies in wait
Beyond them is Lech Kril, he's always hammered when he's on duty,
And Sedna's Thayme finds little need for basic ethicality;
Go out further, you will find Tyl Regor and his brilliant mind
And Sargas Ruk's Bullet Attractors will put you in a real bind,
What a treat for our elite as they watch Tenno corpses burn.
We'll send your ashes back to Lotus in a ceremonial urn.


Our Grineer banners will adorn the face of every colony
A peaceful era will be stricken from all cosmic memory
With tactics, napalm, steel and augments organo-mechanical
We are the very models of the Modern Grineer General.


The tide is turning, it is looking like we just might have to yield
As Vor is trapped with https://forums.warframe.com/index.php?/topic/39419-comics-by-yuikami-added-corpus-rangers/'>yuikami in his impregnable shield,
Vay Hek fell to Tenno forces, he is looking rather porous,
And I wrote each verse of this song with the help of a thesaurus;
But so what if we have fallen, so what if the end's in sight,
And so what if we're faulty clones and so what if we're not that bright?
Though beaten, bruised and battered we have still not yet begun to fight,
For we have pride and we will not go gently into that good night!


Now lockdown's ending, doors are open, Tenno coming into sight
But we won't falter, we won't scatter, hit them with our Grineer might;
With tactics, napalm, steel and augments organo-mechanical
We are the very models of the Modern Grineer General!

Edited by TheThreadWeaver
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