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Posted

 

Anyone ever glue their thumbs to their nipples and pretend they're a T-Rex?

38f.gif

 

That just says it all!  BEST GIF RESPONSE EVER!!

 

Ok, so here's my joke:

 

How much does a platypus sell his rare 5's for?

About 2 plat apiece.

Posted

A young man wakes up the morning of his senior prom in a panic. Being a reckless youth, he spent the last 2 weeks playing Warframe... no preparations were complete. He skips school to get ready for a night of style and hedonism. His first stop is the limousine rental company. He arrives to find 20 people waiting ahead of him. Not liking to wait, but being a polite Canadian, he holds his temper and waits for 45 minutes in the limousine line.

 

After having his transportation arranged for the evening, the young man turns his attention to his attire. He heads over to the best suit rental place he can afford. The store is swamped! A rouge Grineer attack force killed 350 on Tuesday, so there were a lot of funerals this week. Thankfully his date survived, so to look his best he had no suffer through 30 minutes queued in the suit line.

 

Now having his sweet extended ride and Armani to help him, he was beginning to feeling more confident. He rolled on up to the flower shop to grab a corsage for his date. Seeing as he was a pasty nerd, he could not afford to screw this up. He asked for a special arrangement to be made for her. There were a few people in the shop before him, so he waited 15 minutes in the corsage line.

 

The evening was upon him, and his preparations were complete. He hopped in the limo, picked up his date, and made off for the prom in style. He presented their tickets at the door, and they made their way inside. The room was dimly lit, and the music was pounding. After a dance or two his lovely date asked him for something to drink. Being a dutiful man, he made his way over to the bar for an age-appropriate beverage. He was relieved to find no punch line.

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