Lachryphage Posted October 12, 2013 Share Posted October 12, 2013 I don't want to be one of those old people I used to hate, the kind who thought everything was better back in ye olde days, but everything was better back in the old days, damnit! I hear they're not even allowed to have dodgeball in school anymore! Dodgeball! With those big red school balls that might as well have been made of nerf. Remember those? 100% harmless. Even today at 6' and 200lbs I could bean a kid in the face with one of those things as hard as I could and he'd barely feel it. My cousin is the biggest wuss I've ever seen. He still slept with his mom sometimes until 13. 13! In my day his own friends would have beaten the momma's boy out of him, but he's never even been in a fight and he's 15 now. O_o How is that even possible?! And all your music these days sounds the same. That's not just senility talking like it was when my parents said it. It's a scientific fact. They digitally analysed music from different times and found that music has been getting more generic since the 60's. Right now there's less variety than there has ever been. I blame a combination of autotune and don't even get me started on the other reason. Vampires now sparkle and Justine Bieber looks and sounds like a girl. I mean, Vanilla Ice was pretty ridiculous and all, but at least you could tell what gender he was. And why do all the teenage guys have dyke haircuts now? What's up with that? If I'm ever president the first thing I'm going to do is put "bronies" in concentration camps and make them wear arm bands with convenient "cutie marks" so that nobody accidentally mistakes them for people. Yes I had to google what the butt tattoos are called and no you don't want to know what comes up if you search that. It can never be unseen. Anyway, my point is that the entire planet has apparently been castrated and my best guess is that that's what killed Halloween. I haven't had a trick-or-treater in years. I haven't even seen one in the neighborhood. I've lived in three different homes in 2 states since this started. You're all bad, bad people for destroying the happiest day of the year. Couldn't you just set kittens on fire or something? I mean, burning kittens is evil, but at least it's not holidaycide evil. How can you even look yourselves in the mirror? And I say this as someone who hates kids and has felt only annoyance at the thought of trick-or-treaters since the day after I was too old for it. I mean, come on, killing Halloween is just not cool, man. You just don't do that! WTF is wrong with you, you monster?! Not letting your kids trick-or-treat should be considered child abuse and you should all be in prison. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
alphex Posted October 12, 2013 Share Posted October 12, 2013 I don't want to be one of those old people I used to hate, the kind who thought everything was better back in ye olde days, but everything was better back in the old days, damnit! I hear they're not even allowed to have dodgeball in school anymore! Dodgeball! With those big red school balls that might as well have been made of nerf. Remember those? 100% harmless. Even today at 6' and 200lbs I could bean a kid in the face with one of those things as hard as I could and he'd barely feel it. My cousin is the biggest wuss I've ever seen. He still slept with his mom sometimes until 13. 13! In my day his own friends would have beaten the momma's boy out of him, but he's never even been in a fight and he's 15 now. O_o How is that even possible?! And all your music these days sounds the same. That's not just senility talking like it was when my parents said it. It's a scientific fact. They digitally analysed music from different times and found that music has been getting more generic since the 60's. Right now there's less variety than there has ever been. I blame a combination of autotune and don't even get me started on the other reason. Vampires now sparkle and Justine Bieber looks and sounds like a girl. I mean, Vanilla Ice was pretty ridiculous and all, but at least you could tell what gender he was. And why do all the teenage guys have dyke haircuts now? What's up with that? If I'm ever president the first thing I'm going to do is put "bronies" in concentration camps and make them wear arm bands with convenient "cutie marks" so that nobody accidentally mistakes them for people. Yes I had to google what the butt tattoos are called and no you don't want to know what comes up if you search that. It can never be unseen. Anyway, my point is that the entire planet has apparently been castrated and my best guess is that that's what killed Halloween. I haven't had a trick-or-treater in years. I haven't even seen one in the neighborhood. I've lived in three different homes in 2 states since this started. You're all bad, bad people for destroying the happiest day of the year. Couldn't you just set kittens on fire or something? I mean, burning kittens is evil, but at least it's not holidaycide evil. How can you even look yourselves in the mirror? And I say this as someone who hates kids and has felt only annoyance at the thought of trick-or-treaters since the day after I was too old for it. I mean, come on, killing Halloween is just not cool, man. You just don't do that! WTF is wrong with you, you monster?! Not letting your kids trick-or-treat should be considered child abuse and you should all be in prison. I'm glad I'm not like this. My parents actually took the time to teach my common sense and all that good stuff ect. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Lachryphage Posted October 12, 2013 Author Share Posted October 12, 2013 I'm glad I'm not like this. My parents actually took the time to teach my common sense and all that good stuff ect. *sigh* No, you only think they did. It's not your fault. You don't know any better. I blame the parents. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
alphex Posted October 12, 2013 Share Posted October 12, 2013 *sigh* No, you only think they did. It's not your fault. You don't know any better. I blame the parents. Sure okay. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
c_man_ninja_gun Posted October 13, 2013 Share Posted October 13, 2013 Music is the worst it has been and vampires do suck now. But dodge ball was horrible. "Made of nerf" many a' childrens black eyes would say different. It was just another way for bullys to bully. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Katakuna Posted October 13, 2013 Share Posted October 13, 2013 I don't know what uncultured backwater parts of the world you've been living in, but in my neighborhood there's been a constant stream of trick-or-treaters every Halloween since I was born. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Lachryphage Posted October 13, 2013 Author Share Posted October 13, 2013 (edited) Music is the worst it has been and vampires do suck now. But dodge ball was horrible. "Made of nerf" many a' childrens black eyes would say different. It was just another way for bullys to bully. Those big red squishy balls they used at every school I've ever been in are literally impossible to hurt someone with. At home me and my friends played with tennis balls and the worst anyone ever got was a red mark. If someone got bruised from a dodge ball they probably have some kind of medical condition with their veins or something. I don't know what uncultured backwater parts of the world you've been living in, but in my neighborhood there's been a constant stream of trick-or-treaters every Halloween since I was born. http://farm5.staticflickr.com/4102/4895843907_627e2762cc_o.jpg'>Austin, the http://farm9.staticflickr.com/8492/8253836770_1a7e3ddbc2_z.jpg'>state capitol, home of Rooster Teeth and Blizzard. We're also one of the first places getting Google fiber. It's not exactly a backwater. Edit: I found an http://blogs.babycenter.com/mom_stories/the-death-of-trick-or-treating/'>article about the Haloween thing. Edited October 13, 2013 by Lachryphage Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
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