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Pop culture/Anime theories,stories, mash ups and off topic chats~a chill cafe. Nerds welcome. Otakus needed.


(PSN)WINDMILEYNO
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10 hours ago, (PS4)WINDMILEYNO said:

I was all excited earlier 

Story time: 2nd week into being a butcher at a grocery store and I'm running solo, cuz the boss took vacation, Randy retired tuesday, the one other guy that closes with me was simply off today, and the only other person who could help was  mysteriously stricken with instant diarrhea that day....

Anywho, im working the counter, and the back room, freezing to death, struggling to put rubber gloves onto stiff unfeeling digits, when I swear honest to God the oracle stops me and says two men are looking for me. Then two guys in sunglasses look my way and head over. My heart stops. The little old lady is not the oracle, I am about to come to my senses, but then George w. Bush is in front of me and says "son, what do I have to do to get those two lobsters". My heart stutters, I feel instant regret for making fun of him as a kid (it was the cool thing to do) and I mentally make a note to close my mouth, not entirely sure it's even open. Its not George w. Bush, but the voice is still throwing me off in my head. This guy is so well dressed, itd take me months of saving up paychecks just to buy his shoes and tie. I can see my reflection in his sunglasses like I'm watching myself on an hd tv screen. Why did I even bother ironing my clothes today?

*Don't stare*

he most likely isn't the ex president. That sounds slightly disrespectful in my head....

I say "Sir, all you have to do is ask*

Maybe Bush says *well I'm asking*

Sh**, how do you respond that? I was trying to be cool, but I should have just grabbed the lobster stick from the get go. I grab the lobster stick. The lobsters don't want to obey the stick. Rich guy #1 and less rich guy#2 are standing next to me watching, clearly enterntained by their life and death struggle. I plunge my arm into the tank, the lobsters are not making this easy.... 

I realize that it was a miracle I had been shown one time before how to do this, but my mind is blanking on how to ring them up and I'm failing at life....

New thing. 

I ask if he needs anything else and abandon the lobsters in a bucket. His assistant/secret service member/ guy behind him in less awesome suglasses/ whom ever discuss with him on how many things he has on his list or something. They ask for sirloin steaks and fillets. I ring those up. Guy legit just tosses the 18 dollar per pound sirloin into his basket like it's a package of bar s hotdogs. No contempt, just...tosses. Most people place it in a certain spot in their cart, usually in the part you put your purse or child.

I stall for time and fidget with the lobster on the scale and ask what he plans to do with it. I remember the code finally. He says he doesn't know, he just asked his son if he wanted anything from the store, and his kid wanted lobster. The kid asked for live lobster. 25 dollars per pound. 

I weigh them. I put them on coney islander trays. I wrap them in plastic, and poke holes. I have to rub ones stomach to try and calm it down ( but it won't fully pull back it's claws, they remain stretched out) so I have to run and get a bigger tray. I wrap, poke holes, and hand them lobsters.

I am just a normal person, living a normal life, wondering if I just sold someone related to George w Bush lobster.....

And another customer told me I looked like spike Lee. Wednesday was...something.

 

I like story time. Who knows maybe you did?

Hillary makes a campaign stop and visits your store.

MindmileySPIKE: What can I get you, Ma'am? Pleased to meet you! *Shakes her hand.*

Hillary: I would lik...cough cough cough cough cough cough..... cough cough cough cough cough cough cough cough cough cough cough cough cough cough cough

*Falls down to the floor*

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1 hour ago, (PS4)makrisbrik said:

I like story time. Who knows maybe you did?

Hillary makes a campaign stop and visits your store.

MindmileySPIKE: What can I get you, Ma'am? Pleased to meet you! *Shakes her hand.*

Hillary: I would lik...cough cough cough cough cough cough..... cough cough cough cough cough cough cough cough cough cough cough cough cough cough cough

*Falls down to the floor*

Did I just kill Hillary? :0

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5 hours ago, (PS4)WINDMILEYNO said:

I swear I saw Harrison Ford today too....I'm either going crazy...or someone is making a movie in Oklahoma for whatever reason, which would explain the stunt doubles that are running around town

You are going crazy but you know Harrison Fords greatest quote?

"Ford wins again,HAHAHAHAHAHAHA"

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9 hours ago, ninja234 said:

The gifs you use are just as terrible as your tastes.

That was a deep wound...

Gif explanation (off work now):

I'm the security guard. You are the guy in the white shirt. You said that some thing named harambe is the chief ape (although we all know that title belongs to curious george). I laugh, you laugh, we both laugh. Everyones laughing. Then I put you in hand cuffs.

I have to just judge a gif based on what it looks like on the outside, and then start downloading it. It takes ages for just one. You are stuck with what you pick, and you don't throw a fit.

When I get Wi-Fi in my place, you will all see the true power of my awesome reposting skills. Until then, I'm on 4g lte, and iv used all my high-speed data already.

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