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Cephalon Joke-a-Thon Contest [Winners Announced]


[DE]Helen
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(when enter or exit operator/ focus edit mode):

Operator, do you sleep well in that seat? Do you need any pillow, or blanket?  Or maybe let me sing a lullaby! (Turn to 'rude' ordis and sing terribly, then back to normal)  uh oh, I may need to find a singing protocol to download first.

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Operator, do you know why cephalons don't date?                                                                                                                                                                    Its because they SHIP us before we even meet! **insert ordis giggling at his own joke**

Edited by (XB1)TheRedPandaGamr
Clarification
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Operator.. You turning my head operator. Can you stop the ship?                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                  (While moving the ship in  going to the mission screen.)

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I noticed that despite being a clean freak Ordis never comments on your companion after the kubrow quest, so here's what i think he would say:

Quote

Operator? Ordis has noticed that your companion has a-[NOTHER INFESTATION] insect problem.

If wish to [PURGE IT WITH FIRE!] clean it, supplies can be found in the armoury [NEXT TO YOUR IGNIS]...

Please [SLAUGHTER THE LITTLE-] deal with this before Ordis develops any further tics.

I'm up in the air about whether the "further" should be glitched or not, but either way works, I think 😛

Edited by Dagda_Kincaid
typo
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Hey operator, [insert sortie*] just posed cringe, make them** lose troops

*whatever sortie is on, (vay hek for example) ordis will say the name

**depends on gender

I also thought of a another joke for April fools where ordis will say "operator, the lotus has sent a message to you, check inbox" and its mecha lotus and she says "sike" but its received between 0:00 and 13:00

P.s if i dont get in, put the April fools joke in for the next update

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Here's an Ordis joke for you. Shoot the ghastly <string of expletives> out of the airlock and replace it with a cephalon based on Quite Shallow. With Ordis, the mute button is simply not enough; please, please, please give me the option of getting rid of it.

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