Why Carrier is a bro

[MajorTurnip]

Spoiler

Disclaimer: for fun, but not off topic. Read between the lines. Not literally, obviously.

I see people saying things about Carrier. Things that either undermine his contribution to the tennokind or aren't exactly true. Things that forget Carrier's merits and feats done for all 80% of us.

First of all, yes, Carrier helps us with things: like moving things (usually from grineer/corpus ships to our ships), or collecting things, or packing things on our shopping trips.
Carrier knows we are a hardy bunch and fighting is in our blood, that is why he gives us a hand - he knows we are destined for greatness. If we accept his help, he makes sure we are never in need, going about hungry, underdressed or undersupplied.  

However this is where most of people forget that he's not just great at helping with chores. When in the midst of a battle you fire hundreds of rounds per milisecond with your prime AkTonkata, do you remember where you got them from? It was him, plopping ammo boxes down your pockets so you could do your thing, without saying a word, without ever reminding you of it. You know why? Because he cares and because he doesn't mind if you forget. He's not doing it for money or glory, he's doing it because he's a bro.

And when there's no Trinity in sight while you fight for the tenno's plight, cause she maybe might, you know, be drinking with Oberon out of sight? Yeah, you know who's giving you them blue hedgehog pills in that meatgrinder you call "fighting"? Carrier. "I gotcha, fam" he says, but you don't hear it over all the screaming, and shooting and immolating somebody's face. But he's ok with that. Cause all he needed was you being happy doing your thing. Cause he's a bro who understands. Cause he's the coolest bro.

For those of you, who sometimes themselves decide to be a bro and help out one of the cliques from the colorful parade of weirdos, if you bring your Carrier bro on this quest of bros, he totes helps you get those medallions, all true. All he asks is for you to smash everything with your strong manly (even if you are a woman) arms and he will scoop all the crap leaving trinkets visible clear as a day. Cause he knows you don't want to be a space janitor and cause he's not above honest work, but it's ok, he accepts you for who you are. He'll take care of things. Cause he's a bro. The best of bros.

And when the action gets too hot and heavy, with everyone pounding you from every direction, he will cover you, he will stand with you, he will take a bullet for you. Like an action hero blasting everyone with fast firing penetrating irradiated shotgun with wide spread so they forget for a little while about giving you trouble and sort out the beef amongst themselves, giving you some time to breathe. Not like "man's friend" space dog, who will be frozen looking at a flower pot in the corner or like "i like walls" space cat, no, Carrier will be like your guardian angel, staying at your side till the end. Because Carrier isn't the bro you deserved, but because you helluva needed it right then and there. So he'll follow you. Because he can carry hard. Because he's not just some rando schmuck. He's a floating ballsack, a vacuum cleaner. THE Carrier Bro.

To illustrate Carrier broism, I give you this totally objective hierarchy:

Carrier Bro => Space mom > Clem > IRL Friends framing the frame > Op weapons > cool randos > noggles > primaries & melee > other sentinels and smeeta spacecat > secondaries > spacedogs > Baro and his attitude > randos > nulifiers. 


Thank you, 80%, for being a bro for your bro. Never forget your bros.






Why this? Cause I fed up with whining from one side and "lol it's ok cause i don't care" from the other.

[GinKenshin]

Broberon is the ultimate bro, bro >.>

[(PSN)robotwars7]

them loot gains though, brah. spot me at the Dojo?

the truth is that Carrier is too much of a bro, why it isn't wearing a tank-top and screaming "Dench" at the top it's voice is beyond me. people rely on it too much and that's why the changes are coming. it's basically that one friend who tries too hard to help you and only angers you or screws something up. as valuable as it is, nobody is really bothering with other companions as a result. diversity has been getting kicked in the nuts by the meta for a long time now. time for a change.

Adarza bro, that's a true bro right there. removes armour from douches tryna' steal yo girl, and gives you a steroid boost in the crit department, bro. hey, where's my protein shake? 

[SenorClipClop]

15 minutes ago, GinKenshin said:

Broberon is the ultimate bro, bro >.>

Combine Broberon with Carrier for the most brotacular bro-op of the brollenium.  

[MajorTurnip]

Robotwars. Na, Carrier is no tryhard, why it's suddenly his fault? Them other peeps, if they knew how not to be sellfish and take care of their crew would maybe make friends too. Why is Carrier's problem that they can't get chicks and bling into my spacecar just by looking at it? So they went to complain to their mommies and mommies said to man up and start sucking things in while still "having a talk" with our boy Carry. It's good to do some self improvement but it ain't fair, man. Ain't fair (about sucking range and/or whole loot system in general).



Gin, if Oberon was a bro, he wouldn't ditch me cause of Trin. Bros know that bros go before hos. And trinity is a ho cause she givin to anyone anywhere.

 

[(XBOX)Tanta Cinta]

Carribro Brime.

[NativeKiller]

2 hours ago, MajorTurnip said:

Why this? Cause I fed up with "lol it's ok cause i don't care"

Amen.

Edited October 6, 2016 by NativeKiller