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[Fanfiction] Derf Anyo Encounters


Transmorphic_Wyvern
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Aphrodite, Venus

Assignment: Raid

 

Loading transmission...

 

 

"So, let me get this straight. This is your MOA, correct?"

 

"Yep!"

 

"And from what I can see, you seem to be rather...passionate towards it."

 

"Uh-huh! I name it Mora!" The said MOA squawked in response next to the Corpus Crewman, named Tom. "We're going on an outing this afternoon! Isn't that right, Mora?"

 

Loki sighed as the MOA chirped. "Very well... Carry on then..."

 

As the two carried on about their ways, Loki looked back at the rest of his squad huddled around a control panel. "What the..."

 

"Ha! I'd love to see you beat THAT score, Volt!" Ember taunted Volt as the screen showed a high score leaderboards.

 

Volt groaned. "Youknowwhat? I'mbored. LetscheckifLoki'sdoneyet!" Loki had to step back as he suddenly found Volt mere inches in front of him. "Hey! Areyoudoneyet?"

 

"...Yes?"

 

"LETS GO ALREADY." Came Banshee some distance ahead of them from a room with reinforced windows- with her normal speaking volume. "THIS THING ISN'T GOING TO RAID ITSELF, YOU KNOW!"

 

Suddenly, an incoming transmission made them all inwardly groan. Tenno, something's wrong. I'm detecting and unknown signature heading your way. Stay sharp! A feeling of impediment washed over the squad as a geekish giggling sounded from somewhere unknown.

 

Banshee was the first to respond by screeching "SON OF A BI-" before being cut off by the glass breaking, creating a lockdown that sealed herself off. Alone.

 

Facepalming, Loki pushed the other two aside and got to work on releasing the lockdown (after closing the apparent game first) and swore. "It just HAD to be Sudoku..."

 

"That'stheworstkind!" Volt exclaimed in horror.

 

"It's just like my love for the infested." Ember lamented, then shouted to the heavens, "WHY DOES EVERYTHING I TOUCH DIE!?!"

 

The geek-giggles sounded once more, accompanied with a short spurt of hacking and some wheezing. The distinct sound of an inhaler followed afterwards, to which Volt squealed like a fanboy. "Youguysknowwhatthatmeans!"

 

Loki paled at that, consequently failing the Sudoku security console for the upteenth time. "Oh f-"

 

Volt activated his speed boost.

 

And thus, Volt transformed into Volt: The Most Handsome.

 

"My friends," Volt began in a smooth, suave voice, "we have Corpus to conquer."

 

A figure suddenly fell from the ceiling, faceplanted and unconscious on the floor with a nosebleed.

 

A sigh came through the transmission.  It's Derf Anyo...

 

And then Banshee died.

Edited by Transmorphic_Wyvern
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