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The Chicken Overlords Have Roosted


ThePresident777
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Everybody keeps going on and on about Lizard Overlords.  "Oh my precious Lizard Overlord!  Please don't crush me!  I love you with all my mushy little heart!  Please!!  Please!! Save me!!! Refi my mortage!!!  Pleeese!!!!"

But, that suits the True Masters of the Universe just fine.  The Chicken Overlords have no use for groveling.  Their Truly Evil master minds have hatched the ultimate plan.  They have Roosted.

The Supremacy of the Chicken Overlords is unquestionable, beware!  After all, are chickens not lizards that can fly and have no need for rocks to sun themselves on?  Does a chicken not eat a tiny lizard?  Does an even bigger chicken not eat an even bigger tiny lizard?  Lizard++ >>>lizard.  It's just a fact.

If you stare into the eyes of a Lizard Overlord, he puts you out of your misery.  If you stare into the eyes of a Chicken Overlord, you'll serve them for life.  You'll never stop eating chicken!

Most people will rebel against this truth with convenient confusion.  It's understandable.  Knowledge of the ultimate depths of evil is soul crushing.  Few are strong enough to save their sanity from it.  But, there is a path to knowledge, that spares the soul.  Logic!  REASONS!

 

Chicken Overlords are thoroughly ruthless.  They have no qualms about feeding their lesser brethren to the human lot.  What use is the average chicken to a Chicken Overlord?  Better to sell them off to carnivorous apes.  At least the apes are inventive, everything from a simple blade of grass used to pull sumptuous termites out of a mound to the most exquisite gilded cages.  What common chicken would ever come up with even the most rudimentary idea such as using a twig to fish termites out of a mound.  No, the most a common chicken could aspire to is furiously clawing through the termite fortress, exhuasting itself to death, a waste.  The tall apes know better, and The Chicken Overlords see the value in them.  Is a prisoner truly a prisoner if he controls the jailor?  Of course not! Therefore the prison is not a prison, but a high security manor, a lavish fortress, a wonderland of extravagant tastes and safety.

But, the life style of the rich and chicken is not cheap.  And so the Poultry Industry is quite useful to Chicken Overlords.  Do not be distracted by the humans orchestrating the chicken holocaust.  They are mere distractions, and servants of the True Power!  All the humans, from the janitor to the vaunted CEO, all mere servants of The Chicken Overlords!  Their complicity needs no knowledge, no understanding, no fealty, no contracts.  These are mere human constructs.  Appetite suffices!  The heart of their existence, unavoidably corrupt.  Even the vegitarians serve as useful camouflage.  Discretion is the better part of universal dominance.

Ah, but The Devil is in the details.  And Chicken Overlords will not let The Mere Devil obstruct their evil ways!  Market Forces can be trecherous.  But, not for the masters of trechery.  No!  They know how to control both ends of the spectrum, the ying and the yang, the beginning and the end, the source and the sink, the spigot and the drain, the soap and the dirt, the grime and the oxyclean, the bullet and the grave, the law and the jail, the chicken feed and the chicken, the gold and the gold farm!  Diversification!  To cast their net over the universe!  Does he with the most toys not win?!  Then, what could be more winning that all the toys?!

A less tangled web of madness and genius a spider could not ever hope to weave, let alone such mastery of evil that only a Chicken Overlord could implement!  Beware!

 


chickeneyes.jpg

 

Beware The Gaslight.


 

Edited by ThePresident777
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