MoaRider Posted June 21, 2015 Share Posted June 21, 2015 Wow, I have never wanted to shoot somebody as much as I want to shoot Nadia Sudek. In other words, fantastic writing. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Zibbs Posted June 21, 2015 Share Posted June 21, 2015 Question: What the hell has Greg been doing all this time? MIA for a while now methinksjust curious =3 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
BaIthazar Posted June 21, 2015 Share Posted June 21, 2015 Hold on a moment, what does Ford look like? Pre-Lotus, I mean? Probably like Rebecca Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
ROSING Posted June 21, 2015 Author Share Posted June 21, 2015 Hold on a moment, what does Ford look like? Pre-Lotus, I mean? However she looks like under the mask. Which is completely up to imagination/speculation. Question: What the hell has Greg been doing all this time? MIA for a while now methinks just curious =3 Oh he's around, we'll see him next chapter. Don't worry, Nadia covers her bases well... So many people hate Nadia right now :T Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
FiveHours Posted June 21, 2015 Share Posted June 21, 2015 So many people hate Nadia right now :T It means that you've done your job as a writer; to make people love your heroes and hate your villains. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
ROSING Posted June 21, 2015 Author Share Posted June 21, 2015 (edited) It means that you've done your job as a writer; to make people love your heroes and hate your villains. Well, now the challenge is to see if I can change those sentiments towards her ;) Edited June 21, 2015 by ROSING Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
FiveHours Posted June 21, 2015 Share Posted June 21, 2015 Well, now the challenge is to see if I can change those sentiments towards her ;) We shall see. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
ROSING Posted June 26, 2015 Author Share Posted June 26, 2015 (edited) Alright, in terms of word length Chapter 21 is probably the longest one yet...don't know if that's a good thing or a bad thing, really, could be both. Anyway, we are Bolting out of Control to Chaos, try and Absorb what's going on. Edited June 26, 2015 by ROSING Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
FiveHours Posted June 26, 2015 Share Posted June 26, 2015 Alright, in terms of word length Chapter 21 is probably the longest one yet...don't know if that's a good thing or a bad thing, really, could be both. Anyway, we are Bolting out of Control to Chaos, try and Absorb what's going on. All the more to enjoy! And please don't make puns like that Nyxt time... Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Evanescent Posted June 26, 2015 Share Posted June 26, 2015 (edited) *plays battle music* It's showtime. Another pun, and I swear I'll stomp y'all so hard it'd shock you. Edited June 26, 2015 by Evanescent Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
BaIthazar Posted June 27, 2015 Share Posted June 27, 2015 It's happening... awww yeah!!! Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
ROSING Posted July 5, 2015 Author Share Posted July 5, 2015 (edited) Hey guys. So the next few chapters are battles. You know what that means: LATE UPDATES!!It's critical everything falls into its right place so it doesn't get too fantastical or whatever, so yeah. Sorry for sending this out late. Anyway, chapter 22 is out and has moved down to Post #16, and for once I can say that it wasn't that hard to come up with a fitting chapter title... Feedback is always appreciated! Edited July 5, 2015 by ROSING Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Evanescent Posted July 5, 2015 Share Posted July 5, 2015 Rrrrrrrrrr! Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
FiveHours Posted July 5, 2015 Share Posted July 5, 2015 Hey guys. So the next few chapters are battles. You know what that means: LATE UPDATES!! It's critical everything falls into its right place so it doesn't get too fantastical or whatever, so yeah. Sorry for sending this out late. Anyway, chapter 22 is out and has moved down to Post #16, and for once I can say that it wasn't that hard to come up with a fitting chapter title... Feedback is always appreciated! Nicely done. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
ROSING Posted July 6, 2015 Author Share Posted July 6, 2015 Five I always get anxious when I see you post because I'm afraid you're about to drop your very helpful feedback...but I'm glad you liked this chapter! Evan what you trying to say? Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Evanescent Posted July 6, 2015 Share Posted July 6, 2015 Five I always get anxious when I see you post because I'm afraid you're about to drop your very helpful feedback...but I'm glad you liked this chapter! Evan what you trying to say? Grrrrrrrr. Woof. *kills some Nyxes* Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Cyriann Posted July 6, 2015 Share Posted July 6, 2015 (edited) Evan what you trying to say? Grrrrrrrr. Woof. *kills some Nyxes* I think he has a little problem with Nyx and has locked his brain into primitive to ensure she won't affect him for the time he tries to kill her. But that is only assumption. Out of this, ROSING, the new chapter is as Five said, nicely done. Just by reading your texts it is clear that your technique have improved, and I personaly learn quite a few things from your evolution. From text organisation to pacing, including character development you are writting a story that I hope a lot of other tennos are following you closely. Edited July 6, 2015 by Cyriann Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
ROSING Posted July 6, 2015 Author Share Posted July 6, 2015 I think he has a little problem with Nyx and has locked his brain into primitive to ensure she won't affect him for the time he tries to kill her. But that is only assumption. Out of this, ROSING, the new chapter is as Five said, nicely done. Just by reading your texts it is clear that your technique have improved, and I personaly learn quite a few things from your evolution. From text organisation to pacing, including character development you are writting a story that I hope a lot of other tennos are following you closely. Haha thank you! It's great to hear that I can be of use to others! Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Evanescent Posted July 6, 2015 Share Posted July 6, 2015 Well put, sirs, well put. I'd like to see a faster pacing in the action, though. Something to hold you and set your blood racing. It's the clash of the first Tenno! Make it GRAND! But overall I'd say it's a very good chapter. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
ROSING Posted July 6, 2015 Author Share Posted July 6, 2015 Well put, sirs, well put. I'd like to see a faster pacing in the action, though. Something to hold you and set your blood racing. It's the clash of the first Tenno! Make it GRAND! But overall I'd say it's a very good chapter. Noted, thanks! Grahh, pacing. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Evanescent Posted July 6, 2015 Share Posted July 6, 2015 Noted, thanks! Grahh, pacing. Ikr. It's like cooking steak to the right state. Without just the right temperature it'll go horrible. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
HermlT Posted July 6, 2015 Share Posted July 6, 2015 i just read the whole thing and i must say you have made an astounding job making it pretty damn awesome, although it might be more cannon lore wise to start calling tenno squads cells. i cant wait for the next chapter :D Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
ROSING Posted July 7, 2015 Author Share Posted July 7, 2015 (edited) i just read the whole thing and i must say you have made an astounding job making it pretty damn awesome, although it might be more cannon lore wise to start calling tenno squads cells. i cant wait for the next chapter :D Thank you! To Evan and anyone else who can help me out with it, what can I do to make battles seem faster pace? Especially when I have dialogue mixed in with it. Is it better to put things into smaller sentences and paragraphs, or condense them into larger sentences and paragraphs? Any advice helps! Edited July 7, 2015 by ROSING Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Evanescent Posted July 7, 2015 Share Posted July 7, 2015 (edited) Thank you! To Evan and anyone else who can help me out with it, what can I do to make battles seem faster pace? Especially when I have dialogue mixed in with it. Is it better to put things into smaller sentences and paragraphs, or condense them into larger sentences and paragraphs? Any advice helps! I'd say stick to your draft for now. As an experiment, try writing an alternate extract with mixing short, clipped sentences with your normal ones, and reduce the dialogue. You have to have it read fast to feel fast. Use strong, impactful words and create suspense. Throw actions in the readers face in barrages. That's how I do it though..... For eg: Screams. I swung my blade. Desperate swings. Dull, futile snick-snick-snick of tearing flesh. Not enough. Faster. They pour like hellspawn on us. Dammit. Faster. I have to cut them all, slay them all. No time to think. Cut, cut, cut. Flashing steel. Bright blush of blood, blooming like wildflowers on my tunic. Pain. My arms ache. Faster. Faster. FASTER. Sweat. My body burns. Hot. Pain. Have to kill them all. They come. Swing, swing, swing. Kill them all. Faster. Or else I die. Edited July 7, 2015 by Evanescent Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
FiveHours Posted July 7, 2015 Share Posted July 7, 2015 Give your scene a soundtrack. Look through your music folder, perhaps find something else that is fitting, and listen to it while trying to envision the scene in your head. Although definitely not the music I normally listen to, I found listening to Guilty All the Same by Linkin Park and M.A.D by Hadouken! When writing my denial battle between Orion and Hek very useful. But that's just for inspiration. Use shorter sentences, and use more emphasis on actions, not description. Avoid pausing when trying to write chaotic scenes, and use more epic vocabulary when writing about the battle itself. Envision it as those animated still frames you get in the codex of each warframe, but moving. Take a look at Ash's, for example. A lot of things there are happening at once, so give that sort of impression. Another important thing is to make sure everyone gets their part, but to work together. Think of the scene as a camera which flies through every character, dipping briefly into their eyes, their thoughts, then transferring to another character. Think LoTR, where every character gets his or her scene, but it all comes together in the end. No loose ends. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
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