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Hitman: Agent 47 Movie


TheErebus.
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I guess most video game movies are just doomed from beginning.

 

doom-movie-poster.jpg

 

My friend and I saw this in theaters because it opened one day before his birthday. I really liked the last 7 minutes of the movie. But that's about it.

It's too bad that most of the first-person sequence I recall seeing in the trailers was cut down for the lackluster one we get / saw. The ninja battle afterwards was pretty stupid. I really don't understand how ripping off resident evil for about an hour and twenty minutes as they systematically kill off every character except the rock and karl urban can constitute as a doom movie, but whatever. I got to hear the rock say "Big fuckin' gun" when he picked up the "Bio Force Gun" (which is totally not canon by the way) and got to see a pretty badass fight / death sequence with a hell knight.

 

 

^ pretty good scene, really.  I liked Destroyer, too bad he didn't make it.

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Well there's plenty more movies to check-out/face-palm at in the future (not sure which of these are just rumors or have yet to get off the ground):

 

Angry Birds

Assassin's Creed

Dead Space

Deus Ex

Five Nights at Freddy's

Half-Life

Just Cause

Mass Effect

Minecraft

Plants vs Zombies

Portal

Shadow of the Colossus

The Last of Us

Uncharted

Warcraft

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http://www.rottentomatoes.com/m/hitman_agent_47/?search=hitman:%20agent

4%.

Pixels has a higher score. 

 

WHY CAN NO ONE MAKE A VIDEO GAME MOVIE THAT'S ACTUALLY GOOD. 

I suppose for this instance, not many people would like to watch the protagonist being crafty, smart, sneaky and whatnot (I believe that the audience would find it boring to watch, but I would like that).

 

Personally, I lost almost all hope for this movie (I watched most of the 2007 Hitman movie, and it frankly wasn't good) when the trailer showed Agent 47 crashing into a building with a helicopter, slicing away guards and stuff in the floor he crashed in, just to get the antagonist (I think). I mean, that is out of character for Agent 47 (I don't remember a time in any of the Hitman games where he does just that, and he is supposed to be, or I think he is supposed to be, more of an "I'm going to kill you, and you won't know where I am." type of person), and even if there was explanation, it would still be quite silly. 

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Well there's plenty more movies to check-out/face-palm at in the future (not sure which of these are just rumors or have yet to get off the ground):

 

Angry Birds

Five Nights at Freddy's

Minecraft

Plants vs Zombies

For the sake of humanity and for anyone who still has hope for any video-game movie, these better be animated and NOT live action.
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For the sake of humanity and for anyone who still has hope for any video-game movie, these better be animated and NOT live action.

I am not really sure how would Angry Birds be live-action (and what scenes I just came up with in order for Angry Birds to be live-action are abominations), so it probably would be animated for an easier time. 

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For the sake of humanity and for anyone who still has hope for any video-game movie, these better be animated and NOT live action.

Honestly, I hope the FnaF movie isn't animated, but must have the animatronics actually BE animatronics. Not CGI.

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